Wednesday, 30 March 2016

speaking up

"Sometimes getting pregnant can reduce the symptoms and provide some relief"
-- Actual professional medical advice offered to 21- year old Andie

"But don't wait too long;
Because this can impact your ability to fall pregnant naturally;
And may cause infertility"

I was a Uni graduate ready to commence my career;
I was not yet engaged but I will always wonder if perhaps this diagnosis fast tracked the process which saw me upgraded from girlfriend to fiancé;
Soon after the engagement party I had my first laproscopic surgery.
I'm now well over- due for my third.

I'd never heard of it before.
The surgery was the only way to know for sure if the diagnosis was correct.
And yes - More than one of my doctors suggested pregnancy as a means of 'managing' the condition.

This is the first time I am telling my story in a public forum.


Because March is
A W A R E N E S S   M O N T H

And it's taken me 30 days of the month, to build up the courage to complete this post and hit Publish.

But that's the point of an awareness campaign, isn't it?

To shed light on a topic.
Start a dialogue.
Encourage open communication and education..

Society doesn't like to talk about 'female problems' so endometriosis not a medical condition I admit to suffering from despite it causing near-constant discomfort and crippling pain more often than once a month.

It is a difficult condition to describe to anyone who has not experienced it.

Sometimes a picture can convey the pain more accurately than I can explain it -

Very pissed of fire breathing dragons.
With knives.
And machine guns.

The pain can be so extreme and debilitating that it literally incapacitates me.

As a result, it is a huge contributing factor to depression.

It is rendering women infertile.

And yet, I still feel like it is not a legitimate reason to call in sick to work.

O N E  in  T E N   W O M E N
S U F F E R   F R O M   E N D O M E T R I O S I S

So I am simultaneously caught between thinking I should shut the fuck up and not complain; 

Talking about it until I am blue in the face, 
So that maybe others also suffering in silence will feel they can share their story too.

Today I am choosing to talk about it.

To share my story.
And the stories of others.
Because knowing I am not alone truly helped me.

They gave me permission to be kind to myself.

They made me realise I am not crazy,

And the pain is not normal.

They allowed me to accept that it sucks,

But it doesn't mean I am broken.

And neither are you.

"Be kind to yourself on the bad days"

And remember this :

STARTS WITH CUPCAKES >> alex_elle instagram
Alexandra Elle


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